Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Dr. Frizzle in Maxi-Max

Do you know about super maximum security penitentiaries? Maxi-max? Well, poor Dr. Frizzle has been sentenced to such a life, and not for any crime he has committed.  Where once this proud hamster roamed freely through a spacious three-cage compound (bigger than some NYC studio apartments! ba-dum-bum), now he is relegated to one cage, and this cage in lockdown:


Note the cleverly-wrapped page wire.  Why? Because of our mouse "infestion" (as E has so humorously neologized).  These mice, though tiny, are repulsively abundant.  All our best efforts to date have failed to stop them from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.  And now, most recently, they have begun to "visit" poor Dr. Frizzle in his home.  Last week, A saw THREE of these creatures crouched around his food dish, chowing down, while Dr. F. cowered in his tower room.  Why doesn't he fight them off? He's enormous by comparison.  But I guess he's just too sweet-tempered, that old guy.  So finally, we've fortified the cage, hardened the target, if you will, to borrow from criminal justice lingo.

Yet, just last night, I heard a frantic squeaking.  Yes, another mouse had made his way in, through a tiny hole I'd neglected to cover, but couldn't find his way out again.  He was terrified, weeping in his little mousish way, while Dr. Frizzle just sat and stared at him. Ugh.  Needless to say, after I'd dealt with the mouse, washed out the cage, washed my hands about eighty or so times, soothed Dr. Frizzle with soft croons and caresses (yes, hamsters need these ministrations...), and stopped up the last hole, I felt strangely defeated. What now? A BB gun?

14 comments:

Jodi said...

Oh no, poor Dr. Frizzle! Any chance you could talk a friend into taking care of Dr. Frizzle while you get exterminators in to deal with the mouse problem?

faycat said...

Poor Dr. Frizzle, it's so undignified.

You know what you really need - A cat. The only foolproof method. Of course, you'd still have to keep Dr. Frizzle's cage fortified with a cat in the house...

Leah said...

We desperately want a cat! But alas all the cat-sneezers have put the kibosh on that plan. I wonder what Pip would make of a cat?

Too Little Time said...

Hopefuly Dr. Frizzle will soon be paroled! And though a cat would solve your problem, they than want you to thank them profusely for dropping their "prize" at your feet. And sometimes the "prize" isn't dead, they're just playing with it (experience here).

I vote for the exterminators and strong nerves! - Karrie

Leah said...

K, I laughed out loud from your comment! How true.

Anonymous said...

Poor Dr. Frizzle! Cats would help, but they might scare Dr. Frizzle....

I'll vote with Karrie too. Get some good smelling candles....you will understand why....

Kim said...

I had a mouse problem recently and they were getting into my bird cage and my birds could seem to care less! I figured they would have pecked the mouse's eyes out or something...

CSI Seattle said...

I have given this some thought.

Is there any chance that the mice are actually attempting to spring Dr. Fizzle from his current restrictive living arrangements?

Perhaps Dr. Fizzle offered his bowl of food as a way of saying thanks to this impromptu SWAT team.

Maybe Dr. Fizzle is suffering extreme depression and needs to explore the big city, find his parents, AND find out who in the hell named him Dr. Fizzle!

What ever happened to the more tradional names for hamsters? Fluffy, Cocoa, and Butch. My God! Dr. Fizzle...where is the dignity?

Just a thought...but then again, you may just have a mouse problem.

CSI Seattle said...

Oh wait...is his name actually Dr. Frizlle, with an "R"? Never mind.

Leah said...

Butch?!? CSI, I think you're referring to Dr. Frizzle's cellmate...

jolias said...

Am so sorry about the mice. I would recommend the pest-ulator, which worked for me, but I think it would hurt the good Dr.'s ears, too. I have heard that peppermint oil is obnoxious to mice and also that blocking up pipe holes with steel wool--especially by the stove--helps. And you know how HAPPY I would be to "loan" you our cat...

Having a Knit Fitt said...

I've just started watching The Wire DVDs and in one of the first episodes a homicide detective tells a very funny story about having to go home to rescue his wife from a mouse. He ends up shooting it with his service revolver (after killing one of her dress shoes first). In the commentary, the writer says this was a true story. Soooooo, maybe you need to call the police.

faycat said...

Leah, you'll have to remind A about that story in The Wire that Having a Knit Fitt brought up. Clearly, he's the one with the power to eliminate the problem.

Leah said...

You know, it's becoming clear to me that I have to start watching "The Wire." I'm obviously going to love it!